Tuesday, August 26, 2014

My Heart's Song

So definitely one of the scariest or maybe most worrisome things about raising a child/children (in my case) with special needs is if they really understand what you are trying to communicate to them.  How or are they processing information and how much? What are they thinking about? What if something happens to them or someone hurts them and they can't tell me?  What do they love, what do they hate, what bothers them, what delights them? As a mother, am I frustrated or distracted too much?  What more do they need?  How or where do I start? Who needs what more?  Off the subject but equally as heartwrenching, do they know how much I love them? Do I tell them or show them enough? Certainly you want them to reciprocate that love, but you can't always get what you want! These questions plague my middle of the night thoughts. But then, as with everything in life, there are glimmers of hope that sneak up on me all the time. A few weeks ago Johnny was singing in the back seat with his IPAD and I immediately recognized the songs.  I used to sing the Dixie Chicks song "Lullaby" years ago when the kids were babies/toddlers before they went to bed.  I love all things Dixie Chicks, but especially this song, and it sounds like he was listening!

Ok, so he has to do a couple other Dixie Chicks songs to warm up, and he picks his nose and bangs his head with his fish, and I can't focus on his face because if he sees me videoing he immediately stops singing, and he tries to open the door when the car is moving-oh whatever,  I hope it makes you smile :)

"Lullaby" lyrics that he is singing at the end of the video:
They didn't have you where I come from
Never knew the best was yet to come
Life began when I saw your face
And I hear your laugh like a serenade

How long do you want to be loved
Is forever enough, is forever enough
How long do you want to be loved
Is forever enough
Cause I'm never, never giving you up

I slip in bed when you're asleep
To hold you close and feel your breath on me
Tomorrow there'll be so much to do
So tonight I'll drift in a dream with you